Emerging

Emily Apuzzo Hopkins   |   February 16th, 2022

emerging (adjective) - becoming apparent or prominent; newly formed; coming into existence; growing and developing; coming into view or taking shape 

It was warm yesterday and will likely be warm again today. Much like the daffodils, the need to emerge from my hibernation mode is pulsing. The season can easily be faulted. The two years of living under a pandemic’s cruel rule also makes for an obvious scapegoat. But they do not tell the whole story.

For me, I feel the urge to emerge in a couple of ways. 

Isolation fatigue has definitely settled in and I am ready to make an effort to be with people again - socialize, laugh, eat, and be merry in the company of loved ones. It has been an effort to maintain those bonds - albeit loosely - over the last couple of years and will likely still take some semblance of effort to restore the camaraderie we all once knew. But as the latest omicron surge mellows and the temperatures go up alongside the beautiful and wonderful thing that is more daylight, it’s time.

I also feel the need to emerge in and through the multitude of projects that I have picked up and put down and picked up and put down over my adult life. There are so many passions that I carry with me that I love and want to pursue. But sometimes there is a fear of failing. And because my interests are so varied, I don’t know which one I should do when. I love them all - writing, speaking, creating. I have even dreamed of the amalgamated offspring of everything working in harmony. What would it look like? What could it be if I gave it the sunlight it needs to fully blossom? 

Instead of taking the risk, I find myself in analysis paralysis. Analyzing every step as if it is life and death instead of embracing the unknowingness of magic.

As spring emerges on our horizon, so must the passions I pursue. Give them water, give them sun, give them the nourishment they need and stop putting the pressure on them to be anything more than what they want to be right now. Let them be simple and meager if they are to be simple and meager. Let them be loved for what they are today and right now. Do not put the heavy burden of life on them - they deserve the freedom to emerge for themselves.